The Phillies Are The Cast of The Walking Dead

Posted by Stephen Gallo

This past Sunday’s season finale of The Walking Dead was tremendous. It had plenty of zombie action, answered a lot of questions and set up what should be an exciting third season. After my second viewing, I noticed some similarities that some of the characters have with our Phils.

Roy Halladay is Rick. Our fearless leader. Like Rick, Roy isn’t the loudest character, but he gives you confidence just by his terrifying stare. The AMC cameras have never showed this, but I’m sure Rick wakes up before the sun every day to run steps, just like Doc.

Kyle Kendrick is Lori.  No one likes her. She hangs around Rick (Roy) way too much and every time she opens her mouth, you just get angry. They are exactly the same. Actually, I’m pretty sure Kyle and Lori are the same person.

Shane Victorino is Carl.

You can never find Carl. He’s constantly disappearing, especially at night and he doesn’t pay attention to what his parents tell him. He may have ADD. Shane goes wandering off the basepaths and often makes bonehead plays. He also has ADD. 

Vance Worley is Shane. They both have the look of a damn lunatic. However, they both mean well. Worley just wants to go out and protect the lead for his team. Shane wants to protect his stolen family from walkers and Rick.

Cole Hamels is Glenn. 

Glenn was one of the first main characters we ever met on the show, like Cole on this current team. Like Glenn, Cole is not very manly. Cole’s wife is attractive and was on Survivor, so she probably didn’t have many clean, good looking dudes to choose from. So, Cole was a no brainer for her once she got off the island. Glenn has a cute girlfriend named Maggie who settled on him since she's stuck in the middle of a zombie apocalypse.

Jonathan Papelbon is Maggie. Maggie is liked by pretty much everyone who watches the show, for now. She’s the hot new chick. Unlike most of the other characters, Maggie hasn’t done anything to piss us off. Same for Jonathan. Yet.

Chase Utley is Andrea. 

Andrea was left behind and the group was forced to go on without her. Will we ever see Andrea again? Probably. Do we know when? No. Will she be as strong of a character as she once was? We don’t know. See the similarities?

Hunter Pence is Beth. Who? Beth is Hershel's youngest daughter and is the sweet and innocent one of the group. We don’t know too much about her story. We don’t know much about Hunter other than he likes to eat. Season three will be our first full season with Beth, and 2012 will be our first full season with Hunter. 

Cliff Lee is Daryl.  Redneck and certified badass. He’s the new #2 to Rick now that Shane is out of the picture. He wields a crossbow and does it well.

Charlie Manuel is Hershel. Old? Check. Southern accent? Check. Replace Hershel’s shotgun with one of them there baseball bats and you’ll think Charlie stepped into your TV.

Carlos Ruiz is T-Dog.

Like T-Dog, Chooch doesn’t say much. However, sometimes he comes out of nowhere and says something profound (“My nicknang es Chooch”). He’s reliable and loyal to Rick, just like Chooch is to Roy.

Joe Blanton is Dale. 

Even when he was around, you knew he wouldn’t be around long. Same goes for Joe. Whether it’s by injury, trade, or freak zombie accident where his guts are torn right out via his belly button, Joe probably won’t be around much longer.

Dom Brown is every zombie. Like the zombies, Dom keeps coming back for more even though he’s obviously not wanted.  The speed and power of the zombies have been talked up for a while, but once you get one in front of you, they’re easily put down. Same goes for Dom. People are usually seen fleeing from both.

Ryan Howard is Otis. …..